Harvey's Hardware, for all your pipe bomb needs [OPEN]

[eyeforaneye]

Harvey's Hardware seems like a perfectly innocuous establishment in the southwest corner of Ealing. Old, not terribly well taken care of, but stocked to the brim with a huge assortment of tools and supplies of varying quality (and age). When was the last time anyone came to inspect this place?

Regardless, upon stepping inside you'll find no one named Harvey on the property at all. Instead there's a surly young man behind the counter, someone who looks both tired and wholly too alert at the same time, armed with a thermos of coffee, a stack of manuals on fixing god knows what, and a book of Gaelic poetry.

[A]

Maybe you're just perusing the shelves, minding your own business, when you hear a voice from the till: "Loitering's prohibited. There's a sign outside that says so. If you need something specific, ask." Rude tactic but you'd be amazed at how much product Sasuke can move out of this place by being pushy.

[B]

Maybe instead you were lured in by the sign in the window that advertises a 'buy one get one free' deal on all items of equivalent value in the store. Maybe you even went so far as to ask about the promotion. The answer?

"That sign is from 2009. The guy that worked here before me glued it on instead of affixing it normally. The boss found out last year when he tried to remove it, and that's why he isn't here anymore." All that to say... "That deal's invalid. No discounts."

[C]

Or maybe you're just here to ask for recommendations or buy some hardware. Up to you! Feel free to message me if you have something specific in mind that you want set up.

Comments

A

[detectiveofthewest]

"Aww, quit rushing me," said a rather familiar voice in reply as Heiji examined a length of rope. He had a few other things in his basket, including some rather sturdy picture wire.

"This is a delicate operation!"

[eyeforaneye]

He doesn't look up when he hears the voice -- again, too soon -- but his eyes do narrow down at his book.

"You've been here for a while, Hasegawa. How delicate would you say it really is?"

[detectiveofthewest]

"Pretty delicate," said Heiji cheerfully, hi buddy how ya doin. "I'm tryin' to figure out the feasibility of hanging someone from a roof beam."

Well, okay, strictly speaking he didn't need to buy the rope to figure that out but looking at it was helpful. Imagining the killer holding it, twisting it in his hands, darting his hands out and...

[eyeforaneye]

"... I don't want to be legally obligated to become a witness. Don't tell me the details of whatever you're planning on doing." Don't you put that evil on me.

"That said, it's entirely possible."

[detectiveofthewest]

"Oh yeah, I know," said Heiji, manhandling the end of one of the coils of rope. He lowered his voice conspiratorially, either ignoring or forgetting that Sasuke had asked him not to talk about details.

"The cops think it's a suicide, but it's not!"

B

[mensrea]

Guess who was totally duped by the promotion. Stiles didn’t even bother to ask about the validity of it, simply went ahead and gathered as many items as he could hold in his arms. It isn’t until after he’s dumped everything on the counter (a pack of batteries rolls off the surface) and it’s all rung up is he stopped short.

“Huh? That number can’t be right. You forgot the discount.”

[eyeforaneye]

"If you're referring to the sign in the window, you'll notice the note below it saying it's no longer honored." Yes. The extremely small note with the even smaller print.

"The owner's refused to authorize that deal for several years."

[mensrea]

"What!?"

Jaw dropping, he stumbles away from the counter, hands held up in the universal "hold on" gesture, before rushing outside to ascertain this for himself. When he returns, it's in a flurry of movement.

"This is bullshit! That's like, false advertisement!"

He is soooo not going to return all this stuff to their rightful shelves. Sorry, Sasuke.

[eyeforaneye]

Well at least there's a moment of entertainment in an otherwise wearying day. Sure, it gets old having to explain that damn sign so often, but this reaction is more excited than most.

"Someone glued it there. I'm not responsible." Ah, how to make him buy, though... Sharp eyes catch on one of those items, which he then nods to.

"That one is on sale. It's a good deal." Is it.

C

[apolly]

Apollo slams a hammer on the table.

Do your worst.

[eyeforaneye]

...

A hammer which Sasuke picks up, examining it for a price or any kind of identifying tag. Huh. Nope. Luckily the brand is carved into the wood, so now he's pulling out his phone in order to google it and price match it. This is how you run a business.

"I researched your class."

[apolly]

... Apollo is quickly starting to worry for this kid.

He suddenly feels stupid, though, thinking Sasuke wouldn't recognize him, but of course his hair is a dead giveaway. God damn it.

"You did? It's an elective class, so it's not the most popular."

[eyeforaneye]

Wise.

"Your reviews as a lecturer aren't bad and the topic's important. People underestimate the importance of legal knowledge right until they're in a difficult position. Then they're even less receptive to learning."

A - late as hell, oops

[nestinghabits]

"I'm not loitering. I'm browsing. Don't be such a brat," Clint responds from where he's carefully reading over the labels of some chemicals. He doubts that Sasuke could help him, anyways, really, since he's technically shopping for the components for tiny bombs. It's not like he'd ever go up to a cashier and point to a chemical listed in his own personal anarchist cookbook, to ask where to find the thing.

I love late tags, fear not

[eyeforaneye]

Not every cashier is this cashier, friend.

"... browsing for what? This entire process would be a lot faster if you gave me your list and I looked things up for you. The organization in this shop is horrible." At least he knows.

good to know!

[nestinghabits]

"Maybe I need stuff that's not on my list, but I won't know until I see it. That's whole point of browsing, kid." He's old. Stop rushing him, Sasuke.

"And if the organization is so bad, why don't you... I dunno. Reorganize the shelves, or something?"

[eyeforaneye]

"We've already had the conversation that relates to that nickname." And that is all he wants to say on that.

"And I'm not paid enough." At least he's honest. "If you're trying to make strong wooden stakes then I can recommend a good wood, a good saw, and good sandpaper. A lacquer too, if appearance is important to you."

A+C mix, as messaged

[whatmatters]

Ringer rolls her eyes out of sight of the guy at the till, having been forewarned about his penchant for candor. 'Candor' here being a generous descriptor of the referral she was given. She remains among the shelves, calling out with a dry tone that she has no doubt will carry well enough. "Crossbow bolts. In the meantime, I'm going to continue looking at chains."

She's already ensured the store is empty excepting the two of them, don't worry.

why hello there!

[eyeforaneye]

"The Crossbows Act and the appended laws of the Violent Crime Reduction Act 2006 make it necessary for me to see your identification before I sell you something like that." Not that he actually cares. Call it him passing along useful information for if she'd ever decide to shop somewhere else.

"But I don't care too much. How many bolts are you going to need? I have them stored back here in packs of five."

o hay

[whatmatters]

Ringer pursed her lips, ready to move out and show him identification as needed. Except he'd already moved past that and thus, so had she. The girl finally stepped out from the aisle of chain and moved forward to where the desk was, glancing around at the shop's various odds and ends.

"Two packs," she called in response as she wove her way forward. Ringer finally paused at the desk, looking to the guy that the Clan had referred her to and surprised to find him younger than she expected. "Are you Uchiha?"

[eyeforaneye]

He's dutiful enough to secure the items she'd requested, placing them flat on the counter and just in time for her question.

"... I wonder if it should bother me that my name's spreading." No, probably not. It makes business easier, after all. "Sure. Sasuke Uchiha. And you are?" Someone with a need for a lot of artillery, apparently. Oh well, it isn't his job to judge.

That's just what he does in his free time.

You called and thus I appear (A)

[alethiological]

Heading back from Hillingdon, the GPS said this was the closest place. So he should've known better and expected one of the Hillingdon brats to be behind the counter. Joy of joys, but it's one of the quieter ones who has yet to come up and pester him so fine. Ignore him, just get the list and leave.

Such a mindless and robotic task, and the only one that takes longer is reading product labels for the last one - then the brat proceeds to act like a brat. He was more tolerable when he kept his mouth shut. So there's a short sigh, only a slight shade irritated, "Patience is a virtue."

It's the first words he's ever shot back to a member and there is just enough inflection there to know he's being a jerk for no reason.

my summoning skills are leveling up so fast

[eyeforaneye]

Luckily he's talking to someone who is indeed easily offended but not really by jerks or returned rudeness.

"Correct. But less so in business. If you're filling a list for hunting or anything like that then you should know I have some items kept behind the counter for safety reasons. Asking would benefit you in that case." Subtlety, thy name is not Sasuke. He's seen him around and doesn't feel the need to beat around the bush about it.

just don't summon astaroth

[alethiological]

And with that they might get along just fine. Until Sasuke gets his feathers ruffled, anyway.

The only reason Sasuke doesn't get a 'shut up' snapped at him is because there's no one else in the store. Merciful Lord, and Barton mocked him for being unsubtle. The brat would do terrible as an actual Hunter. Bodies left in the middle of alleyways or handing out business cards to random civilians.

...Actually, he'd pay to see that. The train wreck would be inspiring.

"I'm reading labels." The tone is distracted, even if it's less from reading and more from picturing the hypothetical anarchy, "Unless you carry 98 concentration, be quiet."

party pooper

[eyeforaneye]

"I carry a lot of things. We haven't had an auditor in here in four years; all kinds of laws have been passed in that time."

Translation: this place is a minefield of extremely dangerous objects that would be banned in an instant. Don't underestimate my ability to reschedule inspections into infinity and occasionally bribe or blackmail people in order to keep a job.

"What size?"