Harvey's Hardware, for all your pipe bomb needs [OPEN]

[eyeforaneye]

Harvey's Hardware seems like a perfectly innocuous establishment in the southwest corner of Ealing. Old, not terribly well taken care of, but stocked to the brim with a huge assortment of tools and supplies of varying quality (and age). When was the last time anyone came to inspect this place?

Regardless, upon stepping inside you'll find no one named Harvey on the property at all. Instead there's a surly young man behind the counter, someone who looks both tired and wholly too alert at the same time, armed with a thermos of coffee, a stack of manuals on fixing god knows what, and a book of Gaelic poetry.

[A]

Maybe you're just perusing the shelves, minding your own business, when you hear a voice from the till: "Loitering's prohibited. There's a sign outside that says so. If you need something specific, ask." Rude tactic but you'd be amazed at how much product Sasuke can move out of this place by being pushy.

[B]

Maybe instead you were lured in by the sign in the window that advertises a 'buy one get one free' deal on all items of equivalent value in the store. Maybe you even went so far as to ask about the promotion. The answer?

"That sign is from 2009. The guy that worked here before me glued it on instead of affixing it normally. The boss found out last year when he tried to remove it, and that's why he isn't here anymore." All that to say... "That deal's invalid. No discounts."

[C]

Or maybe you're just here to ask for recommendations or buy some hardware. Up to you! Feel free to message me if you have something specific in mind that you want set up.

Comments

[eyeforaneye]

"You're very critical of a good deal, which seems almost hard to believe from the man trying to pressure me to change listed prices in an accredited store." Accredited by one Uchiha Sasuke, because he said so... annnd by no one else for several years.

"Is that your financial advice, then? To shut down the store?"

[detectiveofthewest]

"Might not have a choice. But here's a few things you can do in the short term." Heiji listed off a few points: cost-saving measures, negotiations with existing accounts, a few overages here or there that could have been avoided.

"But that's just if the owner listens to you, ya understand."

[eyeforaneye]

"I don't think he's coming back and I've been managing the accounts on my own for several months now." So there's that bomb of truth right there.

"I'll take these measures into consideration." So he says as he starts ringing up his order... for ten pounds.

[detectiveofthewest]

What a sweet deal.

"Yeah? Shame to see the place fold, then." No wonder Sasuke was so stubborn about the discounts. He placed the money on the counter in case Sasuke was also some kind of weird germophobe.

He took something else out of his pocket, too: a smartphone. "Hey, give me your number."

[eyeforaneye]

"What?" His number? It makes him pause right in the middle of reaching for the money.

"No. ... Why? No." He broke, give him a second.

[detectiveofthewest]

"So I can call you if somethin' comes up. You're not gonna be workin' here after you get your new job, right? Or do you want me to come hunt you down every time I got somethin' to say?"

He looked at Sasuke expectantly. Give.

[eyeforaneye]

"..." You are really vexing in so many ways. When he finally does remove his phone it's with a distinct look of displeasure, deciding that he can always block him if he starts in on anything obnoxious.

"Fine. Listen up." Insert number reading here.

[detectiveofthewest]

Heiji punched in Sasuke's number with lightning speed and dialed. Hopefully Sasuke hadn't been banking on saying the number fast to throw a wrench in this process.

"Okay, now you got mine, too. But I can't answer during shifts, of course."

Heh heh heh. Heh heh heh heh heh.

[eyeforaneye]

This entire affair is infuriating and he can't even pinpoint why; his tsundere heart can't handle it. Immediately he rejects the call, clicking his tongue.

"Don't assume I'm going to call you that often, if at all. I have better things to do in the middle of the day."

[detectiveofthewest]

"It's okay. You can just call me if ya get lonely or something." Not like that was going to ever happen. Ha ha ha yeah.

"So do I get a receipt?"

[eyeforaneye]

"That isn't going to happen." Unless he gets really desperate or has a really low moment.

"The machine's broken. You want me to write it out for you?"

[detectiveofthewest]

"If ya don't mind." Maybe he'd run the sample past a handwriting expert or something and they would recoil in horror as they realized the receipt could only have been written by some tsun jerk.

[eyeforaneye]

Enjoy this absolutely perfect handwriting, almost font-worthy in its dedication to perfection, prices written neatly to the side and sales tax totaled at the end.

"Here. You need anything else?"

[detectiveofthewest]

Gross, he could feel how perfect it was. Maybe he'd frame it instead, as some kind of terrible monument to loneliness and birds. Maybe he'd stick a cat sticker on it every Christmas.

"Nope, that's it! See you around, yeah?"

the sweet satisfaction of finishing two threads simultaneously

[eyeforaneye]

"Sure. If you call me too much or send me strange texts then I'll block your number." Fair warning.

I'll finish you simultaneously idk what that means

[detectiveofthewest]

Heiji waved in acknowledgment, picked up his things, and made his way out of the store.