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undergrounds2015-06-14 01:23 am
a little conversation (aradia and clara)
There are times that Clara isn't the brightest one in the box. She isn't dumb. Not by any means she likes to think. She's practical and patient but she isn't bright like Magra or clever like Willard. It takes time for her to connect the dots of some more obscure things, notice the clues to people or items that, to some, would be considered right in front of her face and yet she never realised it until the very lost moment.
Like right now. Just as she watches some of the kids play tag, something in her head just clicks as overheard snippets of others in Redbright to gossip from elsewhere finally falls into place and she recognises it as something coherent, solid, and being about what Aradia had done in regards to some lightbulbs. The people never said her name but she can extract enough hints and information that it was her.
It immediately causes some alarms in her head to ring, ever so faintly, as a sudden bubble of guilt and concern gets the best of her.
While the children need to be watched over, Clara thinks that they can have one day of their ghostly guardian not watching over them as they pal around in the park. This is an emergency. They'll understand. So she excuses herself on deaf ears and heads off in order to look for her fellow ghost.
It takes her a while to find Aradia, exploring more than she's ever explored before, but she finds her soon enough after enough false stars and dead ends that would frustrate some but not Clara. Not when it concerns someone she worries and cares for.
"Aradia?" It's her. Of course it's her. Not wanting to waste anymore time she quickly adds, "Can we talk?"
no subject
"I should have handled that better." Because goodness gracious she should have. No ifs, buts, or whats there was a better way to have respond than almost panic like that. She knows that's not how it works. She knows and should have kept a levelled head and explain it better. It wasn't fair to her at all when she just wants to know how it works and who it works with and why it...
...
....
.....
Oh.
Then it clicks. You could almost see a literal lightbulb flicker on over Clara's head when she puts two and two together after all this time. Maybe she should have been quick on picking it up. "... Aradia? You never had an anchor before?"
no subject
How does she answer that, really? 'No' sounds rude, being dismissive is rude, dodging the subject is rude. There's no way to avoid talking about it that doesn't run the risk of making things even worse.
But at the same time, tackling the topic would probably require explaining so many things, so that's completely out the window. She's not doing this. She doesn't want to do this, nobody can make her, she could just leave - but that would then disappoint Clara and
Can she not exist right now. That'd be lovely. For once she's actively wishing she was really as tactless as most people think she is, because then she wouldn't be as concerned for upsetting one of her few remaining friends. "No? I don't think I have, anyway. Are... they that necessary?"
no subject
Alright that maybe bit of a lie but she tries her best to keep calm and explain this bit without making it sound terrible or scary or something out of a PSA announcement.
"At the beginning? Not really. It isn't important when you're still new and figuring things out." Like how Aradia is and how Clara used to be. "Though in the long run I like to think they're needed. I've seen others who didn't have an anchor just-- How do I explain it?"
Clara makes a few vague and stranger gestures in the air like that would make sense or give her the words she needed for this. This is harder than she thought. "Faded? No. Weaker? Yes. They weaker in a way. Become more disconnected overtime. Definitely less stable meaning they had less control of their powers. Which made them to get noticed by people and since they didn't have proper control or even full control of their powers, they were either banished o-or worse."
no subject
But even then it's only a possibility, and an unconfirmed one at that. And if it ends up being true, then she'll just have a deadline to deal with. A strangely indistinct and hard-to-define deadline.
Crap.
"That sounds... bad." Understatement of the year, but she's not an idiot. It does sound drastic. "But that can't be the only cause of them weakening, right? Being a ghost is all willpower and focus and stuff. Maybe they didn't want to stay any longer."
no subject
Clara never understood the strange rules the spirits had to live by. Vampires? Werewolves? She had a rough idea what they had to abide to. Fairies? A little obscure but if you look hard enough, you'll learn.
Ghosts? There's not a lot of things said about them besides the type of ghosts out there and why there are ghosts. There are no rules of how to be a ghost, how to interact with other ghosts or vampires or people who turned into different animals. One find themselves just as a spook and need to learn everything from the ground up, no knowledge gleaned from the past one could trust. Anchoring is a concept she learned 'fairly' recently -- Around fifteen years back.
Maybe someone should write the next young adult series on ghosts. Spread awareness. Make the public interested in knowing more about ghosts besides trying to speak and/or banish them.
"Listen: If you're not interested in it now, Aradia, then don't feel pressured to do it." Really. There'll be no attempts to set her up on anchor dates or the like. "I want you to know because I care for you."
and the 'late tag of the century' award goes tooooo....
So admittedly, the topic draws at her in ways she can't really describe. It's an opportunity she would've pounced on as a medium, a chance to explore the limits of what she could do and help others avoid the same mistakes. And maybe it wouldn't be that bad. Maybe it'd actually help her work towards her goals, finally get some closure--
-- but then the moment passes and she shuts down again at Clara's worry, because she can't leave anything behind. She can't. "I'm okay. Really. It sounds like an interesting topic but... I should be fine? There's no real guidelines for how it works. Maybe I don't need one."
Too late does she realize that her instinctive denial comes across as callousness. But at least this is a bridge she can mend later, if she has to.
no subject
"Could you-- Could you consider it at least?" Clara asks her, believing that's the only thing she can think to ask right about now.
She doesn't want to pressure Aradia if she ultimately decides that, yes, she is better off on her own with no anchor -- And maybe she is! Maybe an anchor is only for weaker ghosts and Clara thinks Aradia has proven to be much more stronger than her in many ways since meeting each other as spirits. -- but surely it wouldn't hurt to weigh the pros and cons.
Especially the cons if there is a risk of danger to the ghost being more vulnerable to harm. "You can just sleep on it for a little bit," she says and she finally cracks a smile at this point. "Or 'sleep' on it since we don't need much of that anymore."