undergrounds | Whisper the prayer of transformation.

A- Returning to London , the tub

She waited with both great apprehension and joy for her release out of the hospital. Ten years and Alice was already making a list of the things she'd go see. She wanted to see the parks she used to play in, the old ports she would visit, and Hyde Park was on the top of her list. She was practically shaking with excitement when she was waiting patiently for her release. The doctors had given her a slew of medication -- not a surprise. Anti-psychotics, benzodiazepines, SSRIs, and some to help her sleep at night. All of them with a big, bulky folder of directions, phone numbers, and other sort of paperwork with names and such. When she first entered care, she barely spoke a word, and now that she was being let go, Alice barely spoke a word, again. No goodbyes offered, even if nurses, patients, and doctors tried with her, Alice tore out of the hospital without a second look.

She was free again.

Hyde Park was quite a distance away -- she'd have to take public transportation to get there. And, of course, to get a cup of tea on the way there, since her medication often made her feel sluggish. As soon as Alice is out in the real world again, her reaction isn't that of joy and there is no running about. The world is much bigger than she remembered and much more frightening. Alice had left it, deeply shaken. She couldn't really greet anyone on the way back to the subway or anywhere else. She kept her head low, awkwardly rubbing her cheek or combing her hair, all odd little tidbits of hers when she was nervous.

She was terrified. Alice thought to herself what she could possibly be thinking. Upon getting on the old routes her family used to take to the coven (which, by now, Alice had memorized), she took it up to the assigned housing, with only a bag of clothing and her things, nervously teetering away on the train, with her old stuffed rabbit firmly in her arms. Alice was eighteen years old, but her skittish disposition and short, malnourished stature surely presented her as someone much younger and the stuffed rabbit didn't help. She looks like a child and acts the part, ducking her head as people passed by her. While the idea of looking at others filled her with dread, her mind was racing with thoughts and visions.

Today could be an off day.

B - Redbright Institute, because Alice is lost

Two days after her initial release, Alice secluded herself to sleeping in a bed of her own, with no round the clock check ups from doctors. She slept tightly with her rabbit -- but decided that the bed wasn't enough halfway through the night and took to under the bed. When she awoke, Alice was combing through notes and drawings -- clues to her past and where to go. She was obsessed with remembering these things, the jittery little thing kept them in a notebook, pieces of papers popping out of pages. Redbright Institute. Now she remembered, that was one place her father worked at, one place she knew would give her clues to where to go and what to do.

The world was still very much bigger than she thought, so stepping upon the campus isn't what she expected. It was bigger than she remembered and very foreign. And Alice spent a good time pacing about outside, carrying her rabbit firmly in her arms until she worked up the courage to speak.

Sort of.

She probably hadn't spoken a full sentence in months, so her matter of speech was strange, almost monotone and low. Sucking in a breath, the small, Alice tried to ask for help and where to go -- no one helped her, she jumped into this without thinking.

"Sorry," She mutters, keeping her head low and her rabbit close to her chest. She wasn't this meek, she nearly forgot how to interact with others. "I'm lost? Help?"

If that even worked, if she could formulate a sentence, but talking to others again was so difficult.

C - Coffer's Shop

It is not a coffee shop she's familiar with; her father had a penchant for the fancy coffee shops, in which he met some of his colleagues there, or, according to her older sister, he goofed off at them, playing chess with others. Tea sounds nice -- it sounds great. Upon entering the shop, Alice takes a sigh of relief that it's not busy. Still clutching her rabbit in one hand, Alice fumbles with her side bag, feeling around for the coin purse -- she stuck some money in there, she's not sure how much.

What she does remember is the smaller pleasures helped a lot, but ordering tea was proving to be a difficult feat, especially for a girl who was struggling just to talk to others. One step, just one step that was recommended in therapy to deal with social anxiety. She watches how others order and what they do, standing at the counter before she steps up bravely and orders tea.

Just plain chamomile, since anything caffeinated will rile her. As soon as she gets it, Alice nearly runs over a patron, whisking herself to a nice, quiet corner.

"Sorry," She mutters lowly, keeping her rabbit and cup of tea gripped tightly in her hands before she continues.

D - Wildcard!

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She would have been content wandering around for a few minutes longer, until her thoughts were interrupted by a voice. Startled, Alice turns around around, clutching her bag as if to shield herself. She forgotten that shops always had people greet you as soon as you entered.

"Uhm," She glances around -- for a moment, Alice forgets why she's in here, up until she glanced at a scrying mirror that reminded her of her mother and Alice remembered.

She was looking to get out of her housing. Unsure of herself, Alice's green eyes darted back before she could look at the floor before she regains her bravado.

"I was... I was wondering about this area, not so much the shop."

Kenzi's lips pinch in sympathy at Alice's startling. At first, she thinks that Alice is coming from an abusive home - more or less influenced by her own experiences.

"Are you looking for a place to stay?"

Kenzi doesn't know if there's some sort of protocol she's supposed to do. What she does know is she's calling Abigail asap.

Fiddling with her pendent for a moment, Alice hesitates answering. At eighteen, she would have figured she would have hit the ground running -- have a job, a good place to live and neither of those things are happening. Swallowing, Alice nods, finding it difficult to look at her.

She doesn't want to say she's in specific housing for people like her, right out of the loony bin.

"I am," She clears her throat, "I.. I was looking to be closer to people like me."

Kenzi nods thoughtfully - she's been homeless before, she knows how hard it can be finding someplace to stay and that London's political climate doesn't particularly help a witch out either.

"Say no more, honey."

Kenzi goes to the front door and puts down the 'gone to lunch' sign into the window. She wants to give Alice a tour, and she can't do that while worrying about customers.

"Let me take you upstairs! There are some spare rooms for witches who're looking for a safe place to crash."

She heads towards the stairs, but still waits for the girl to follow at the base of them.

"What's your name?"

A safe place to crash? Well, that was fine with Alice. She learned a little about Stratford and werewolves, but it wasn't enough. She glanced around the shop one more time, clutching her things. Strangers were a little difficult to deal with and it was even more difficult when Alice knew she had to at least try to socialize with others for the sake of getting her footing back into the world of witches.

"Alice," She finally snapped out of her daze, losing herself in the things in the store, "Alice Liddell."

Reluctantly, Alice starts to follow her, finding it difficult to not stutter over her words, "So- there are spare rooms?"

She would give everything to leave that assisted housing and be around others she could relate to. She couldn't really trust humans as much as others could.

Kenzi ignores the stuttering, mostly because she knows if someone brought attention to her own nerves she would become a defensive mess and that's not how she wants to introduce this girl to them. Especially if she wants to be apart of their coven.

Which she wouldn't be asking for quite a while, at least until Abigail okay'd her. Right now she was just a witch looking for a place to stay. Kenzi didn't recognize the last name, but then again she wasn't from England originally.

"Yup, we got three rooms total. Two beds in each, but there's only you right now!"

That might change, but Kenzi wasn't going to say as much. Once she reached the top of the stairs, she gestures to the three doors dotting the small hallway. There were two communal bathrooms, one upstairs and one downstairs, but seeing as how the house was nearly always empty safe for the three girls who didn't live there - Kenzi didn't think Alice would have much trouble.

"Doesn't cost anything, all you gotta do is help us out with the store."

They couldn't spend all their time here, after all. It only made sense to ask that of their 'renters'

It did make sense and it was a fair price, Alice reasoned. It didn't stop the overwhelming sense of dread for a simple task of possibly talking to people. She nodded as she kept those fears to herself. This week was already pushing her to a bit of a breaking point in terms of socializing with others, but not to the point where Alice would spiral out to a anxiety attack.

Communal bathrooms weren't that unusual; the hospitals sometimes had shared bathrooms, much to Alice's disapproval, but the ten years there, she grew to live with it. A slow draw of breath, Alice swallowed down her disappointment that she would likely be stuck living with others for a very long time, hospital or not. Assisted housing or not. It didn't matter that Alice would be the only one, just having the knowledge she'd be with strangers any time was enough.

So, she nods, absorbing every detail, everything that would be asked of her. "And what sort of tasks do you ask others to help you with?"

Customer service wasn't her forte, but- "And... your coven, are they- what if someone wanted to join?" What if someone wanted to join that initially came from a Circle Daybreak family like her?

"Eh, watching the shop. Cleaning, doing tarot readings for people who want them if you're any good at 'em."

Really nothing too strenuous, even by Kenzi's standards. She had been greatly opposed to doing anything in relation to this shop before. She wasn't a chup, she didn't work for a living.

But eventually Abigail started up school again and needed help.

"You'll ...have to talk to our uh...leader?"

They really hadn't set up a way to do this who 'new members' thing. Alice wasn't the first to join, but Kenzi had never pointed someone to Abigail for approval.

Watching the shop would be good exposure, she was sure. One of the group therapists would have urged Alice to join in on that. It had came up in discussion so many times, but Alice never paid attention to it, until now. For the sake of getting back into society, sure -- more importantly, witch society.

"Who is your coven leader?" Something about this question seemed to exude confidence from Alice. She was young, she had forgotten most of the trade of witches and early spells. She would likely spend a great amount of time playing catch up and that was already embarrassing. She wouldn't expect a stranger to vouch for her, either. After a pause, Alice added in- "It has been some time for me, but I want to do better. I can do better, I need more practice."

"Aa - Lilith!"

They hadn't had the code names quite long enough for them to stick, yet. And it wasn't as if they had actually used them that much either. Still, when it came to new people - Kenzi wasn't too trusting. But this was enough right? Be nice, be a good coven girl.

Alice had the sinking feeling that it wasn't a real name -- the name of a succubus and Circle Midnight, after all, it just seemed too perfect. Still, she wouldn't pry, she just would nod her head fervently. She could be good, she had potential, and suddenly it felt awkward trying to make herself look good in front a stranger.

Alice possessed no confidence, even found herself a tad flustered trying to talk to her, "Well- ah. Alright. I'll do my best to remember," Seriously, Alice was having issues with memory lately, it was starting to be a struggle trying to remember people's names, "And I can do whatever is needed to help. I promise I'm a quick learner. It's just been a very long time, I lived with humans for ten years and I didn't have access to magic. But I'm still as much as a witch as anyone else."

Whisper the prayer of transformation.

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