Aʟɪᴄᴇ Pʟᴇᴀsᴀɴᴄᴇ Lɪᴅᴅᴇʟʟ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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undergrounds2015-09-19 07:03 pm
digophelia) wrote in undergrounds2015-09-19 07:03 pm
Entry tags:
Your eyes never close, your mind's not at rest.
[OOC; as a note, the following log will involve content of mental illness! so consider this a light content warning if this sort of talk upsets you!]
PRELUDE - psychiatrist's office (closed)
Visits to the psychiatrists office were regularly scheduled every other week for Alice. The waiting room was awkward, filled with children and teens around her age. Once the appointment was over, Alice would walk out with her regular prescription.
"Have you been taking your medication?"
"Yes, of course," Alice couldn't really look at her psychiatrist . She was exhausted and struggled to carry on a regular conversation with others. Whatever his name was, he was an odd fellow, a middle-aged man, and very lanky. Alice would fidget the whole entire time she sat there, in order to keep awake. She had no choice but to take her medication, because the hospital started to really increase welfare checks on Alice. Since he reported back, Alice would always assure him she was on her medication.
Whatever this doctor's name was -- she had forgotten. She was starting to forget a lot of things, lately. But what Alice hated the most, was that she was always tired and she always wanted to sleep and not go anywhere. Alice's mind was half there as he continued advising Alice to continue seeking her counseling and therapy secessions with him. Apparently he deemed her so erratic and her memory issues so concerning, Alice had heard him say he wanted her back next week. Finally, Alice peered up at him, "... Next week? At ten-thirty? But I have classes, I-"
"I want more appointments with you, Alice, your memory loss may be caused by flashbacks. The hospital never gave you the proper tools of deconstructing those memories and how to move past them. Don't you want to be free of those memories?"
"Of course I do! Who would choose to be alone, imprisoned by their broken memories?" Alice turned away, swinging her feet on the chair and gazing out the window. Fall was coming and the leaves in the trees were starting to turn orange and yellow. Alice had mentally checked out on the psychiatrist's words as he prattled on. When the sound of paper came with his writing for an increased dosage of her prescription, Alice took it as her cue to leave.
She wobbled out, her head spinning on the medication. Glancing down at the paper, Alice took a breath.
He increased everything. I'm already falling asleep everywhere!
She couldn't concentrate on her magic and schoolwork. She could barely move, some days, or even eat. As Alice left the building, she came to the conclusion that she had to make a choice. Without looking at other patients, parents, and other faculty members in the building, Alice slowly ripped the paper into fours and threw it away.
For the sake of her magic, Alice would stop taking her medication.
A- Islington, The Jolly Roger
Certainly, it was the strangest place she chose for the evening. Alice wasn't really interested in drinks, or the company. She stood out like sore thumb amongst most of the patrons. She was small, slender, and with her heart-shaped face, she looked far much younger than she did. It had been a week since Alice had been off her medication and with that, she was starting to gain more confidence. Unfortunately, the withdrawals would escalate the hallucinations and Alice was more short-tempered.
"Touch me again and you'll be missing most of your fingers," She finally loses her temper with and older man who had tried to pressure Alice into letting him by a drink. Alice doesn't give him time to answer, she responds with a hard enough shove to where he hits the table. The last she hears of him is a string of vulgarities as she strides away. Most of the men here are nearly twice her size -- in retrospect, it was a mistake coming here.
Yet, she hoped her small, youthful appearance would make her a target for vampires. This bar is a hotspot for various supernatural creatures, right? She wasn't the most subtle with her investigating and didn't know where to begin. All of it was overwhelming and Alice did what she could to take it in stride, finding a nice corner to watch others and listen.
C- Westminister
She was becoming more brazen off her medication and, at last, bits of her real personality started to bleed through the mask of a timid, frightened girl. Patrolling the barracks late at night, desperate for any clues or hints became a slow thing for Alice. She wasn't a hunter, she was a witch, and used what she could to find anything to find something regarding her family.
"Do you know about the Liddells?" If they put together the pieces of who she was, that was fine. Her thirst for revenge was pushing her to be more and more bold in asserting who she was. If they came to learn who she was, so be it.
Alice was scurrying away in the dark, wiping off her family's heirloom, the unbreakable and indestructable vorpal blade.
She never felt more alive than she had at that moment, defending herself against a vampire. It was a shame she didn't kill him.
D - Harrow - Coffer's Shop
Come the next day, Alice found herself in Harrow, which was becoming a frequent haunt of her's. She was tired, mentally and physically, cuts and bruises littering her arms and legs, along with a visible bruise on her cheek. She wasn't sure if she fell or if someone hit her -- it was hard to tell with hallucinations. The staff knew her name by then; Alice ordered a large cup of espresso, her books tucked underneath her arm. She wasn't sure what to make of the baristas greeting her with "Good morning, Alice". Like anything else, she took it in stride, ignoring her anxiety and fear of speaking to others.
It was ironic, she was sure she may have disemboweled a vampire last night and she was stuttering while she ordered coffee. Relieved, Alice went to her favorite corner, opening her books on spells and magic, blowing into her coffee.
It had been a long week and her questions still hadn't been answered and her memories weren't any less broken.
PRELUDE - psychiatrist's office (closed)
Visits to the psychiatrists office were regularly scheduled every other week for Alice. The waiting room was awkward, filled with children and teens around her age. Once the appointment was over, Alice would walk out with her regular prescription.
"Have you been taking your medication?"
"Yes, of course," Alice couldn't really look at her psychiatrist . She was exhausted and struggled to carry on a regular conversation with others. Whatever his name was, he was an odd fellow, a middle-aged man, and very lanky. Alice would fidget the whole entire time she sat there, in order to keep awake. She had no choice but to take her medication, because the hospital started to really increase welfare checks on Alice. Since he reported back, Alice would always assure him she was on her medication.
Whatever this doctor's name was -- she had forgotten. She was starting to forget a lot of things, lately. But what Alice hated the most, was that she was always tired and she always wanted to sleep and not go anywhere. Alice's mind was half there as he continued advising Alice to continue seeking her counseling and therapy secessions with him. Apparently he deemed her so erratic and her memory issues so concerning, Alice had heard him say he wanted her back next week. Finally, Alice peered up at him, "... Next week? At ten-thirty? But I have classes, I-"
"I want more appointments with you, Alice, your memory loss may be caused by flashbacks. The hospital never gave you the proper tools of deconstructing those memories and how to move past them. Don't you want to be free of those memories?"
"Of course I do! Who would choose to be alone, imprisoned by their broken memories?" Alice turned away, swinging her feet on the chair and gazing out the window. Fall was coming and the leaves in the trees were starting to turn orange and yellow. Alice had mentally checked out on the psychiatrist's words as he prattled on. When the sound of paper came with his writing for an increased dosage of her prescription, Alice took it as her cue to leave.
She wobbled out, her head spinning on the medication. Glancing down at the paper, Alice took a breath.
He increased everything. I'm already falling asleep everywhere!
She couldn't concentrate on her magic and schoolwork. She could barely move, some days, or even eat. As Alice left the building, she came to the conclusion that she had to make a choice. Without looking at other patients, parents, and other faculty members in the building, Alice slowly ripped the paper into fours and threw it away.
For the sake of her magic, Alice would stop taking her medication.
A- Islington, The Jolly Roger
Certainly, it was the strangest place she chose for the evening. Alice wasn't really interested in drinks, or the company. She stood out like sore thumb amongst most of the patrons. She was small, slender, and with her heart-shaped face, she looked far much younger than she did. It had been a week since Alice had been off her medication and with that, she was starting to gain more confidence. Unfortunately, the withdrawals would escalate the hallucinations and Alice was more short-tempered.
"Touch me again and you'll be missing most of your fingers," She finally loses her temper with and older man who had tried to pressure Alice into letting him by a drink. Alice doesn't give him time to answer, she responds with a hard enough shove to where he hits the table. The last she hears of him is a string of vulgarities as she strides away. Most of the men here are nearly twice her size -- in retrospect, it was a mistake coming here.
Yet, she hoped her small, youthful appearance would make her a target for vampires. This bar is a hotspot for various supernatural creatures, right? She wasn't the most subtle with her investigating and didn't know where to begin. All of it was overwhelming and Alice did what she could to take it in stride, finding a nice corner to watch others and listen.
C- Westminister
She was becoming more brazen off her medication and, at last, bits of her real personality started to bleed through the mask of a timid, frightened girl. Patrolling the barracks late at night, desperate for any clues or hints became a slow thing for Alice. She wasn't a hunter, she was a witch, and used what she could to find anything to find something regarding her family.
"Do you know about the Liddells?" If they put together the pieces of who she was, that was fine. Her thirst for revenge was pushing her to be more and more bold in asserting who she was. If they came to learn who she was, so be it.
Alice was scurrying away in the dark, wiping off her family's heirloom, the unbreakable and indestructable vorpal blade.
She never felt more alive than she had at that moment, defending herself against a vampire. It was a shame she didn't kill him.
D - Harrow - Coffer's Shop
Come the next day, Alice found herself in Harrow, which was becoming a frequent haunt of her's. She was tired, mentally and physically, cuts and bruises littering her arms and legs, along with a visible bruise on her cheek. She wasn't sure if she fell or if someone hit her -- it was hard to tell with hallucinations. The staff knew her name by then; Alice ordered a large cup of espresso, her books tucked underneath her arm. She wasn't sure what to make of the baristas greeting her with "Good morning, Alice". Like anything else, she took it in stride, ignoring her anxiety and fear of speaking to others.
It was ironic, she was sure she may have disemboweled a vampire last night and she was stuttering while she ordered coffee. Relieved, Alice went to her favorite corner, opening her books on spells and magic, blowing into her coffee.
It had been a long week and her questions still hadn't been answered and her memories weren't any less broken.
no subject
She was lucky. The fight could have escalated into something much more violent. But as Alice started to speak, she started to show signs of something else. Alice nods -- she actually nods quite a bit, to the point she forgot what she was nodding about. She starts to speak, almost winded, "Ugly brutes, that's for certain. They... they had something. It looked like oil. Oil all over, with faces in them."
Alice was so accustomed to oddities in her world, that she was convinced with what she was seeing was actual spell work. Her eyes dart up to him, allowing him to look, "You should be careful if you look over there. Maybe it was some sort of black magic, I don't know."
no subject
Oil all over, she says, with faces in them. He lifts his eyes to her face as she says that, studying her. Black magic? Lancelot doesn't know enough about magic to know if such a thing is possible. An illusion, maybe? It could be. She's clearly frightened about something. She doesn't appear high, visually, but... well, that doesn't mean it wasn't in her head, either.
"I'll be careful," he assures her, "I swear it. Let's focus on you first, though, shall we?"
no subject
Breathe. Slow and steady breaths, like the ones they taught her back in therapy to calm herself. A few minutes of silence pass as Alice breathes calm breaths through her slender body, nearly tuning out Lancelot's presence. Once she deems herself calm enough, Alice slowly starts to open her eyes to the world around her.
Much better.
Through the darkness of the streets and the street lamps casting shadows, Alice swears she start to see that slithering, disgusting oil out of the corner of her eye. While she manages not to burst into panic, she turns her eyes back on Lancelot's shoulder. Suddenly, she grips his arm to steady herself.
no subject
Then she starts, grips his arm and he reflexively moves his other one to steady her more -- drawing back just enough to meet her arms.
"Alice?" he prompts, quietly concerned. Is she feeling faint? If she is, he's going to have trouble keeping to his 'no hospital' promise.
no subject
"Over there," She tells him with a hushed whisper. To her, it looks like an over-sized leech, blood and all, oozing out of the shadows she grips his arm tighter. It couldn't have been a hallucination to her, it had to be something else by a vampire, after her attempt to attack them. "Right under the light. They're doing it again."